Graduation

I had to go back to high school for my graduation ceremony, even though I'd already been to college for two years. That was just the way things were; people often had to wait months after they graduated to have a ceremony. There was a big pool of people waiting to be officially graduated, and each graduation ceremony a set number were selected. I got the impression that two years was still a long time to wait, though.

I wasn't at all enthused about the situation. I'd been away from high school too long to care about any of the ceremony and the red tape involved was more hassle than it was worth. My mother was very keen on my attending, though, so I did. I turned up on the day of the ceremony in jeans, paratrooper boots and a t-shirt, as is my wont. I figured that the gown would cover most of my clothing anyway.

Usually, that would be the case. But my mother ran up to me, her arms full of billowing shiny fabric in a hideous bubblegum pink. She'd bought me a dress. She explained briefly to me that I had been voted "Miss Cannabis." It seems that various girls from the graduating class were voted as representing various concepts or things. Usually, they had titles like "Miss Economics" or "Miss Chastity," but a group of stoners had gotten together and had enough of a majority to get "Miss Cannabis" on the roster. Oddly, it wasn't me they picked. The voters just picked the titles and the sashes were randomly assigned to the graduating girls.

The upshot was that I had to wear a big pink dress and advocate marijuana, albeit not actively. Luckily, I was way past caring. I pulled the dress on and adjusted my sash. It had enormous puffs at the shoulders, making me look like a linebacker. The outfit did come with a tiara, though, which I kind of liked. I kept my army boots on, but the outfit came with little stick-on pink bows that I had to put on the toes.

Someone else ran up to me with more sashes. It seems that I also got one for being an honor student, another for being vice president, another for never having caused any car accidents and I got to wear a big silver badge for being a Call of Cthulhu game master. I was actually rather touched by the last one, especially as I've only done it once and it was a few days ago. The effort was certainly worth a badge, though.

The rest of the ceremony went normally. There was a huge line, names were called, and everyone wished they were somewhere else.

After I had grabbed my diploma and shaken hands with the principal, I found myself backstage with all the other students. I wanted to get my kit off and get back into street clothing, but nobody else was doing so so I waited. I didn't want to have to put everything back on.

A line of older men in suits filed back the students milling about backstage. They seemed to be presidential candidates, although I didn't recognize any of them. They were uniformly grey-haired, respectable and unremarkable. One of them congratulated me on having so many awards, although he didn't seem to care what they were for.