Hate Flash
Words.
Moniker
This sounds too close to "monkey," and always lets me down when I realize it has nothing to do with monkeys.
Pussy
When used as slang for "vagina." Why do I hate it? Well, it's just not very funny, is it? There's a million slang words for male genitalia -- wang, winky, ding-a-ling, tallywhacker -- most of them are fun to say. So why have our junior high schools dropped the ball on creative synonyms for the other gender?
Trundle
There was a time when I thought a "trundle" was nothing more than a bed or stretcher on wheels. I used to get mad at my parents when they'd use it as a verb, like "Trundle on down to the store and get some bread." I thought they were making it up, that "trundle" could be used that way, and it sounds so stupid. When I think of someone trundling I picture them all bundles up in sub-zero temperature snow suits, big puffy mittens, a scarf wrapped around their neck and a loose-knit hat covering their head, leaving only a small patch of exposed face for the eyes... they're waddling around (the trundle) and, I don't know, possibly urinating themselves. Imagine my disappointment when I looked it up in the dictionary and saw that it could be used as a verb. Gazing up into the darkness I saw myself as a creature driven and derided by vanity; and my eyes burned with anguish and anger.
Jubilant
This word has nothing to do with jujubes. Actually, I have that same complaint about a lot of words.
California-Cuisine
OK, so I cheated there, that's actually two words, not some kind of hyphenated compound. Still, I don't like I hearing it and I find it difficult to say. California cuisine. (Oh yeah?) People around here actually use the phrase while maintaining a perfectly straight face. Many restaurants are very proud of their state-regulated cuisine, which, from what I can tell, is comprised of any regular meal with the addition of sun-dried tomatoes, olives, and feta cheese, and the madatory avocados. I once ate at a Greek restaurant in Vancouver, British Columbia that was apprently serving California Cuisine. It's odd how tomatoes are good when they're sun-dried, but bad when they're dried out under a heat lamp in a fast food joint, isn't it? I wonder if that has something to do with the amount of flies present during the drying process.
Vallejo
While we're on the subject of California, there's a town not too far away from here known as Vallejo, pronounced
Hissyfit
It's just the kind of word that makes me want to kill.
This sounds too close to "monkey," and always lets me down when I realize it has nothing to do with monkeys.
Pussy
When used as slang for "vagina." Why do I hate it? Well, it's just not very funny, is it? There's a million slang words for male genitalia -- wang, winky, ding-a-ling, tallywhacker -- most of them are fun to say. So why have our junior high schools dropped the ball on creative synonyms for the other gender?
Trundle
There was a time when I thought a "trundle" was nothing more than a bed or stretcher on wheels. I used to get mad at my parents when they'd use it as a verb, like "Trundle on down to the store and get some bread." I thought they were making it up, that "trundle" could be used that way, and it sounds so stupid. When I think of someone trundling I picture them all bundles up in sub-zero temperature snow suits, big puffy mittens, a scarf wrapped around their neck and a loose-knit hat covering their head, leaving only a small patch of exposed face for the eyes... they're waddling around (the trundle) and, I don't know, possibly urinating themselves. Imagine my disappointment when I looked it up in the dictionary and saw that it could be used as a verb. Gazing up into the darkness I saw myself as a creature driven and derided by vanity; and my eyes burned with anguish and anger.
Jubilant
This word has nothing to do with jujubes. Actually, I have that same complaint about a lot of words.
California-Cuisine
OK, so I cheated there, that's actually two words, not some kind of hyphenated compound. Still, I don't like I hearing it and I find it difficult to say. California cuisine. (Oh yeah?) People around here actually use the phrase while maintaining a perfectly straight face. Many restaurants are very proud of their state-regulated cuisine, which, from what I can tell, is comprised of any regular meal with the addition of sun-dried tomatoes, olives, and feta cheese, and the madatory avocados. I once ate at a Greek restaurant in Vancouver, British Columbia that was apprently serving California Cuisine. It's odd how tomatoes are good when they're sun-dried, but bad when they're dried out under a heat lamp in a fast food joint, isn't it? I wonder if that has something to do with the amount of flies present during the drying process.
Vallejo
While we're on the subject of California, there's a town not too far away from here known as Vallejo, pronounced
vah-LAY-ho. How, exactly, is it that its 116,000 residents can get away with using the spanish pronounciation of the j, yet not the ll? Come on, guys, it should be either vah-YAY-ho or vah-LAY-jo. YOU CAN'T HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO, CALIFORNIANS.
Hissyfit
It's just the kind of word that makes me want to kill.