Walkthrough: Nelda Nockbladder's Anatomy Lesson
finally giving something back to the gaming community
This walkthrough is not intended for the first-time player of Nelda Nockbladder's Anatomy Lesson. Part of the fun is trying to figure out what the heck is going on in the first place. This walkthrough is meant for people who have already stared at a level for hours, unable to figure out what they need to do.
It will make no sense unless you've at least seen the levels before.
The purpose of this walkthrough is not to discourage you from buying the full version. Scott Miller is a genius and you should send him money. There are no cheat codes given, nor the password to allow you to skip any of the levels. The purpose of this walkthrough is to allow you to experience all of the joys of conquering Nelda Nockbladder's Anatomy Lesson without most of the frustration, making your experience pleasant and agreeable, as all things in life should be.
Lesson 1: Behold the Brain!
The first lesson is fairly straightforward. Jump and spit at the falling eggs. Each egg you destroy uncovers a piece of the brain - when it's totally revealed, you're done.
The eggs will release random creatures when you spit at them. Occasionally an egg will produce a Blue Plate Greelynob, which will fire at you until you spit at it and destroy it. If you touch an egg, it will definitely produce a Blue Plate Greelynob. If you let an egg hit the floor, it will turn into a Pig Zap and ricochet back towards the ceiling, destroying every egg it hits on the way. Luckily, you can destroy a Pig Zap in this level by spitting. (You can't always.)
After the brain is revealed, a turquoise box with a switch appears in the lower right. Spit at it to end the level.
Bobbing schloob: all colors are harmless except green, which releases very slow pointing fingers from the left. Jumping over them gives you points. If they touch you, you die.
Answer: The brain is unique among fooblick.
Lesson 2: Lubdub...Lubdub...
Beware the red Exploding Salmon Eggs. You can climb up the right side of the ladder until the one that's out of line, then jump off to the right and move up at the same time, then go left again to get back on to the ladder. Quickly move up to the platform, being careful of the trap that will shoot at you from the left. It should only shoot once; you can jump over the bullet.
If you mess up and hit the Exploding Salmon Egg that's out of line, it will start to slowly move back and forth. You'll have lost a life, but it will be easier to pass.
Stand a little to the left of the red part of the pipe and jump up. An egg should be released. (It will turn into a Pig Zap, but that's unimportant.) Keep knocking down eggs until there is a pop and the vertical barrier beneath you explodes.
You'll need to knock down eggs for a lot longer than you think - sometimes as many as a hundred times. Luckily, nothing is trying to kill you up here. You can just hold down the Shift key.
Climb down - an Elasticow will be approaching from the right. Touching it is death, but you can spit custard at it and destroy it.
Watching out for both the floor shooters and the Peashooter Gargle-puss on the right, advance right until you can jump on top of the button above the Peashooter Gargle-puss. This will destroy both it and the floor shooters.
A Blue Plate Greelynob will appear from the left. Spit at it.
Bobbing schloob: all colors produce harmless Kanga What?s except blue, which releases very fast pointing fingers from the right. Stand far to the left if you want to jump over fingers.
Answer: Roofrack-ready hearts are popular among Hittites.
Lesson 3: Our Friend, the Skull
Jump to the grey floor via the moving purple platforms. The orange platforms will not kill you, but will release bullets diagonally from a random corner of the screen. If you are prepared for these, you can dodge them.
Spit at the orange button on the machine at the left of the screen. This destroys the orange platforms.
Make your way to the highest moving platform. Remember: platforms move under you; you don't move with them. Don't fall in the water.
Once on the highest platform, it stops moving. Spit at the big magenta ball on the right when it comes down. A chain of events will materialize a turquoise toggle switch on the platform you started on. Go there and/or spit at it to toggle it.
A teeter-totter will appear on the grey floor. Jump down to it. (You can save time by jumping facing right, continually spitting, to hit the orange button and the Blue Plate Greelynob that will appear.) You'll be launched up and rematerialize on the starting platform, but you won't lose a life.
Bobbing schloob: harmless, except for yellow which releases fairly fast fingers from the left.
Answer: Skimping on the treble leads to plastic softening.
Lesson 4: Kidney Stew is Fine
Jump up to the platforms, careful of the Peashooters (remember to hunker down) and spit at the floating plates; they'll destroy the protective shield of the other Peashooter.
After you've destroyed both Peashooters, fingers will fly from the right of the top two levels. Hunkering defeats them as well, but they're followed by three Blue Plate Greelynobs (one on each level). Destroy them by spitting; it helps if you take care of the middle one first.
Bobbing schloob: every color brings a medium-speed finger from the right. The platforms make it easy to dodge in this level; it's an ideal place to ring up points.
Answer: Kidney is bring to one feeble.
Lesson 5: Wall of Pelvis
The sound on your computer may go nuts here. Turn off music (Ctrl+M) and turn it back on again.
It doesn't matter how many times you shoot the pelvis; the only thing that matters is that you get it to hit the moving orange button on the upper right of the screen. Do this by jumping a lot and spitting at the pelvis when it gets too close. It will shoot at you intermittently, but not very well.
When it hits the button, the pelvis turns into four or five miniature pelvises. Those can and must be destroyed by spitting.
Ride the blue moving platform to the platform on the right, then jump up and bump the orange button. A Blue Plate Greelynob will appear; spit at it. It will be a while before you're in a good position to hit it, but it also takes this one a while before it starts shooting at you.
Bobbing schloob: all colors cause fingers to fly from the left, go half-way and double back. Yellow and blue brings fingers from the lower half of the space between the bottom two platforms, green and red the upper half.
Answer: False. Complete weeblitz ignorance.
Lesson 6: Everybody's Tube
When the pink balls come out of the three tunnels, spit at them. A chain reaction moves a finger closer to a button. Failure to spit at a pink ball in time turns it into an indestructible Elasticow. Okay, I don't know for a fact that this Elasticow is indestructible, but it comes straight from the bottom and you have no chance of spitting at it.
When the flying orange button passes you on the way down, spit at it.
Jump on the moving platform, but only after it's made its rounds once, triggering the leftover finger's departure right where you'd be standing.
Ride it to the right and jump on the button in the floor.
Bobbing schloob: red brings harmless Pig Zaps, yellow and green bring medium-fast fingers from the left. Blue, oddly, causes slow-moving giant eyeballs to appear. Touching them is harmless, spitting at them turns them into non-firing Blue Plate Greelynobs.
Answer: One tube among many apt groolwiggs.
Lesson 7: Ribs and their Parasites
Jump to the platform labeled Garnossity and start spitting at the flying finger, trying to advance it to the button.
The Inverse Formula for Sock Size will fly around, depositing little gramophone/cannon things that move and shoot very slowly at regular intervals. You cannot destroy any of this by spitting, but you can touch them without fear and destroy the cannon/gramophone things by walking into them. If you have been spitting at the finger diligently, you may not even have to do that. They all disappear when the finger touches the button.
After the finger hits the button, it ricochets back. Crouching will save you.
The Inverse Formula for Sock Size performs a chain reaction and eventually becomes an Elasticow, which you must spit at. A Blue Plate Greelynob appears, which you must also spit at.
Be very careful not to hit the bobbing schloob; it is very dangerous in this lesson.
Bobbing schloob: every color causes a big eyeball to fall directly on you, crushing you, no matter where you are or if you moved.
Answer: Bark like a pigeon.
Loosen 8: Living in a Liver
If you found this page via a search engine, this is probably why you went looking for it. The liver is the hardest level, barring the registration-only Mystery Gland, and is hard even for a veteran.
Jump into the machine. It will spit you out and you will rise again, starting as a tiny head. Before you fully rise, go right, but not so far that you hit the black ball (which will kill you, as will the pink robots if you wait too long to pass right).
Traveling past the second blue band, except when on a platform, will cause the indestructible Elasticow to zip to your location and kill you.
Once fully risen and between the robot and the black ball, you must master a tricky move:
Climb up the ladder quickly, then, using your momentum, jump up and right to the ladder directly above the scoreboard. Go easy; it's really easy to overshoot this one.
Now you must master a trickier move: go straight up until you are right about to hit the black ball, then go right and then left quickly while still going up, so that you leave the ladder for a moment but still travel up, avoiding the black ball.
That's the hardest part. Now wait for the floating platform, and ride it to the platform on the right, jumping on the button. You will become large again.
Jump to the new, blue moving platform, being careful to hit it directly lest the Elasticow kill you or the green acid hit you. It will speed up when you land on it; be prepared to jump again. It is best to wait to jump to the platform until it is very close to the ladders again.
Climb through the ladder structure (all the traps are gone) and jump on the orange button on the lower left.
Bobbing schloob: by standing on the lower platform of the one free-standing ladder and hunkering down, you can spit at the schloob and never be hit by the fingers. Every color releases one from the right which, after a long pause, returns from the left.
Answer: "Unique among the fooblick." How those words bring joy to the many heezblisters who await the resolution of Kolbeck's Problem of the Seven Bottle Brushes.
Lard 407.3: Epidermagumbo
Climb aboard the moving platform and go left to step on the orange button. The Kanga What?, usually just decorative, is useful when the spit-proof Elasticow appears. Shoot the Kanga What? and it will bounce over to the Elasticow and destroy it. You need only do this once, unless you stall without advancing.
Jump up and to the left, and walk to the higher-ceilinged chamber. Jump and spit to destroy the dangling green lobe, then time yourself to spit through the gap and hit the orange button to the right. You cannot kill the Antigropes, nor can you spit through them. Be persistent.
Having done this, a toggle switch appears in the lower left while a platform closes off the lower section of the screen. Evil Anti-Neldas advance from the right; jump when they spit. With the sound on (or having played before), it's easy to avoid. They spit four times and are okay to touch. You cannot destroy them with spit.
The platform then retreats, and you can jump down and toggle the switch. From the upper left comes a Blue Plate Greelynob that shoots a lot more often that usual and has some natural cover. Be careful.
It's possible to die by the Evil Anti-Neldas, then respawn in the tiny lower section of the screen with the platform still closing it off from the rest. This is bad. You can still toggle the switch, but it's almost impossible to spit at the Blue Plate Greelynob. You will certainly lose a life, possibly all of them.
Bobbing schloob: red causes a very slow finger from the right, yellow a faster one from the left. Green is harmless, blue causes a big eyeball to fall from the sky and kill you dead.
Answer: All answers are wrong.
Zootlepop () Fleeboo 13-b
This lesson is easy. Walk over to the pink doohickey on the right and push it all the way to the left. Repeat. If the eyes get close, spitting at them once will make them reverse direction. If they touch each other, they will also reverse direction. Touching an eye kills you in a disturbing way.
The more you spit at the eyes, particularly the top one, the faster they return.
Eventually, the chain reaction from the pink thing makes the buttons meet and the barrier to the blue section disappear. The eyes won't go there. Hiding there and/or shooting the eyes to change their direction, get to the toggle switches. Each one destroys an eye.
Blue Plate Greelynob approaches from the left.
Bobbing schloob: red is harmless, yellow causes a finger to come from the left, turn around, then turn around again. Green does the same as yellow, except fruit appears. And this time fruit kills you. Blue makes Uncle Hosmer appear; he is not harmful.
Answer: Melon
Snack Bar
You must clear away all the food to get to the end. Don't spit on the bubble; unless you know the password to the Mystery Gland you won't be able to record your score. Nothing on this level can kill you, and you can't destroy anything with spit.
Congratulations! You've finished one of the most peculiar games online. Now go back and read the help file.