Swap Meet Ninja

I was at a swap meet with my father, but he was my uncle. I kept looking at him and realizing he was my father, then remembering he was my uncle. It was confusing. He'd dyed his hair an unnatural brick red, which looked very striking on him. He had tiny hexagonal glasses, with smoky lenses. He was wearing black jeans, a black flannel shirt, and a long PVC trenchcoat in brilliant lime green.

I can definitely advise my real-life poppa to make any one of these bold fashion moves. He looked cool.

I have no evidence that I was anything other than my usual dumpy self.

Anyway, we were at this swap meet looking at the usual stuff. They had a lot of booths selling CDs, though. Really cheap CDs, and bands I like. This is rare. I was looking at many CDs, and Uncle Pop was looking at huge boxes of magazines, as is his wont when he's only my father. Usually, though, I don't have much to look at and finish looking at everything in the room long before he does. This time we were neck-and-neck.

One seller had a lot of Oingo Boingo CDs. I was looking at every one of them - they were albums I'd never heard of before - when suddenly I heard a commotion.

My father/uncle had jumped on top of a table and was brandishing a cartoonishly huge gun. It was black with green and red LEDs. I was worried that he had finally snapped and was going to start killing the bovine old women blocking the flea market aisles, but then I followed his gaze to his target.

A mob of skinny men, dressed all in black, were scuttling in through a fire exit. They looked like a cross between ninja and aliens - their heads were a little too big, their arms and fingers too long.

Uncle Pop raised the gun and started firing. It was pretty cool! The gun acted like a regular slugthrower, except that the air around the projectile was very distorted. Also, when the bullets hit the alien ninja, the ninja just disintegrated.

Soon all the ninja were dead. I found a bunch of good CDs, too.