Epilogue
Fuck y'all. Fuck all y'all.
I started my experiment about ten months ago. At that time I was in love with a pretty girl with long red hair, I had a high paying programming job and a burning hate for everything. Since that time I've lost them all.
In place of the girl, I have someone much better. As for jobs, I found
something new. And when it comes to hate, well, I lost it too. Somewhere along the way it just left me.
While I was living the life of a yuppie, I decided to try making an entertainment web site. I came up with a domain name and registered it. Though it had its highs and lows, I consider it a success.
I should, perhaps, explain what the site is about. It's a site based on basic human cruelty and many unfortunate stories. My best friend Walt and I have been in the business of being mean to people for quite some time. What better excuse for a web site could there be? So it began.
We were writing hate like it was going out of style, and maybe it is. I think my favorite feedback I ever received was "You're one of those rare people who actually deserves to die." Other than that, I made some friends, and gained a few fans.
Time went by and somewhere along the way, the girl left me. I suppose I had bought her enough stuff, and she decided to cut her losses and leave. I learned not to trust everything with long hair and nice smile, and she learned a valuable lesson in capitalism.
I had met her several years past, at a large company in which I worked. She was pretty and I was lonely. I asked her out the first time by guilting her into going to a hospital with me. My boss' wife was in a coma. That led to many bad times. My boss apparently wanted to bang her, and as a result, I lost my job. I was framed for stealing RAM.
So I continued seeing this girl for over 4 years. We had our moments. I got a better job, and she was happy. That meant I could buy her more stuff, which in turn meant I could see her more. Being a fool, I didn't see the pattern. One day I finally broke down and told her I loved her, she left, that was that.
So, at that point, I had only the job. At this job, I had originally been hired as a graphic designer. My purpose was to make the web site and design ads for the company. In fulfilling my job duties, I designed a pretty nice ad campaign. Being one who isn't blessed with the gift of foresight, I used a picture of my then girlfriend in the ad. After her leaving me, I had to sit around the office all day and stare at her picture on the wall. Seriously, there wasn't a wall in the office without a framed copy of my advertisement on it.
Imagine this, you love someone, then they dump you and break your heart. Then, as a reward, you get to stare at them all day and hate yourself. Sound fun? It isn't. Each day grew worse than the last. I was torn between my desire to smash every one of those damn frames, and my desire to keep my comfortable income. I finally settled on neither. I packed up my desk and walked out.
I eventually found a new job. Doesn't pay as much, but I feel better about myself. I also got a new girl, and she's very sweet and kind. It's funny what being happy can do. It makes you feel comfortable, then it makes you become lazy. Lazy isn't what you want to be when you're writing things that quite a few people read.
I started to update less and less, and when I did, they weren't as good as they once were. I was starting to almost dislike the people that read. I started taking offense to the insults and criticisms. And most important of all, I stopped caring about my favorite invention at all. It had lost all of its joy to me.
There are really only two options for someone when they get jaded with their creation. The first option is to piss and moan, throw a temper tantrum and wallow in self-pity. This solves nothing, and serves only to make you look like a fool.
Then there is the second option. Bow gracefully, and with a smile, say good night. Move on to something different. Sometimes it's hard to realize when you've finished your run. You want to stay around and grab what you can, like a burned-out pro athlete, trying to get what little glory that's left.
I chose option number two.
In place of the girl, I have someone much better. As for jobs, I found
something new. And when it comes to hate, well, I lost it too. Somewhere along the way it just left me.
While I was living the life of a yuppie, I decided to try making an entertainment web site. I came up with a domain name and registered it. Though it had its highs and lows, I consider it a success.
I should, perhaps, explain what the site is about. It's a site based on basic human cruelty and many unfortunate stories. My best friend Walt and I have been in the business of being mean to people for quite some time. What better excuse for a web site could there be? So it began.
We were writing hate like it was going out of style, and maybe it is. I think my favorite feedback I ever received was "You're one of those rare people who actually deserves to die." Other than that, I made some friends, and gained a few fans.
Time went by and somewhere along the way, the girl left me. I suppose I had bought her enough stuff, and she decided to cut her losses and leave. I learned not to trust everything with long hair and nice smile, and she learned a valuable lesson in capitalism.
I had met her several years past, at a large company in which I worked. She was pretty and I was lonely. I asked her out the first time by guilting her into going to a hospital with me. My boss' wife was in a coma. That led to many bad times. My boss apparently wanted to bang her, and as a result, I lost my job. I was framed for stealing RAM.
So I continued seeing this girl for over 4 years. We had our moments. I got a better job, and she was happy. That meant I could buy her more stuff, which in turn meant I could see her more. Being a fool, I didn't see the pattern. One day I finally broke down and told her I loved her, she left, that was that.
So, at that point, I had only the job. At this job, I had originally been hired as a graphic designer. My purpose was to make the web site and design ads for the company. In fulfilling my job duties, I designed a pretty nice ad campaign. Being one who isn't blessed with the gift of foresight, I used a picture of my then girlfriend in the ad. After her leaving me, I had to sit around the office all day and stare at her picture on the wall. Seriously, there wasn't a wall in the office without a framed copy of my advertisement on it.
Imagine this, you love someone, then they dump you and break your heart. Then, as a reward, you get to stare at them all day and hate yourself. Sound fun? It isn't. Each day grew worse than the last. I was torn between my desire to smash every one of those damn frames, and my desire to keep my comfortable income. I finally settled on neither. I packed up my desk and walked out.
I eventually found a new job. Doesn't pay as much, but I feel better about myself. I also got a new girl, and she's very sweet and kind. It's funny what being happy can do. It makes you feel comfortable, then it makes you become lazy. Lazy isn't what you want to be when you're writing things that quite a few people read.
I started to update less and less, and when I did, they weren't as good as they once were. I was starting to almost dislike the people that read. I started taking offense to the insults and criticisms. And most important of all, I stopped caring about my favorite invention at all. It had lost all of its joy to me.
There are really only two options for someone when they get jaded with their creation. The first option is to piss and moan, throw a temper tantrum and wallow in self-pity. This solves nothing, and serves only to make you look like a fool.
Then there is the second option. Bow gracefully, and with a smile, say good night. Move on to something different. Sometimes it's hard to realize when you've finished your run. You want to stay around and grab what you can, like a burned-out pro athlete, trying to get what little glory that's left.
I chose option number two.