By: staniel [2002-05-10]

Zindaloo

To be continued, sporadically and possibly not at all.

Baron Zweihauser hit the ground running, the lumpy fog parting where his feet dashed it away from the ground and into tiny swirling storms for brief moments before it regained its sedentary decorum, the oily-perfumed mist flitting away from his bespectacled head, and the various other forms of earthlogged moisture obscuring his vision for all but a yard or so in front of him. The clouds were piled in rich layers, he noticed momentarily, as with a single fluid motion he stole the autogyro. In his near-panic (the good Baron was not known to enter fully into those states of mind marked by the loss of one's faculties entirely) he thought only of lateral movement, of distance away over the earth, as his best chance for escape, and neglected to ascend higher than would have been necessary to clear a single-story dwelling, which it was not. There was nothing really of note for quite some time; if the ground had been visible it would have shown itself to be a poor sort of ground for anyone's purpose save a few, and those unwise to name; that is, it was hard-packed soil high in clay and alkali, sprouting a few clumps of weeds and patches of brown grass from time to time, flat as a whole but with small bumps and divots to thwart anyone unlucky enough to be on foot, and steeped in mysterious, unsettling history. It was much like the ground on the edge of a pine forest he'd known in one of the boggier colonies of old Albion, and in fact a few clicks ahead a line of trees sprouted on his left. He turned slightly and saw no more vegetation. Forty minutes or so later he was above a field of some kind of grain.

The pursuers were still behind. This was not a new country to Zweihauser, but it was not well-known to him either, and he wondered about the forest and if he was likely to reach the manor of any of the reclusive personages of these parts, and if he would be wise to have anything to do with them if he did. He recalled a fragment of verse from his dreams:

Treat not with these lords of blasted earth:
They always want their money's worth.

Which, he reflected, was sage advice, as one of the faster pursuers was gaining on him. He engaged some gears on the machine he was fortunately an expert at operating and increased his speed a good deal. During one of his frequent, unhelpful glances over his shoulder - he still could not see for the mist, and had not had any knowledge of it or its fellows by the traditional senses since he had begun his flight - he caught a glance at the usual distance of three feet or so, a large harvesting engine of some kind. The forepart (the part he'd seen in most detail) was circular and rotating, and he had some sense of an operator somewhere behind, of a system which kept a cushion of air beneath it and some sort of propulsion behind. It wasn't moving terribly slowly, but the next one he passed and the one after it were both an inch or so closer, and he got the impression that they were in a staggered sort of line, all moving in the same direction. The idea occurred that the next one most likely would not hit him, nor the one after that, but a collision was certain eventually. He pulled the yoke to the right with the gentlest of touches, but at this speed the vehicle's stability was poor, and he found the tail of the craft swishing back and forth, making his course erratic and threatening to pitch him from his seat. He grabbed the yoke and fell backwards a bit, finally, accidentally gaining some altitude but not steadying his course in the least but fortunately clearing a stone wall. Thinking more clearly, he lessened his speed and balanced his machine somewhat, increasing his peace of mind but not in the least solidifying his notion of where he was flying to or what business he had there. The pop of a belt snapping and the immediate increase in the motor's speed when deprived of most of its load indicated that the differential gear connecting the driveshaft to the main rotor was out of commission. Belatedly, he realzied he was a good forty feet up. The superior make of this autogyro provided for the main rotor and the stabilizer to have separate mechanisms connected to the gearbox, and the stabilizer was still spinning. Without the force of air downward from the rotor, it had the opposite of its normal effect, forcing the tail sideways. The Baron was seated at the center of the craft's gravity, and found himself spinning as he would if he had been sitting at the center of a merry-go-'round as he lost altitude. When the motor banged and sputtered, running at a speed it could never have managed with the rotor's mechanism still in place, it was simply too much and he fainted.

This, at least, was fortunate. He was in someone's backyard, facing a wall like the one he'd passed over shortly before he lost conciousness. He could not see the first wall behind him, but the mist had cleared and he could see twenty feet or so before everything lost definition. Behind him was more of the yard, to the front the aforementioned wall with which he'd nearly collided, to the left his autogyro, which did not seem to have suffered any further injury, with another wall somewhat behind it. A small outbuilding was near to the wall he faced and to his right, and a tall, narrow house was past it and set further back from the walls, which he realized surrounded the place on at least three sides. Occasional, immense hardwood trees were evident, and he dragged the autogyro between a large one nearby and the wall, keeping it out of sight (he hoped) from the house and the smaller building.
ringadingding [2002-05-10 00:21:50] twins (hey rebekah anderson, it's me)
Where did the name Zindaloo come from?
This seems to be making out for a helluva good story....can't wait for the next installment. Other than that, I can't think of any other comments...except that I wonder when we'll see Knifekitten again....
sources [2002-05-10 00:30:59] staniel
Our own Prussian king, lately working under an assumed name but with all his former zeal and talent, provided the word "Zindaloo". As to what it is, that's for a later installment. This is partly (the stolen autogyro chase through a foggy marshland) is based on a dream I had. The other main character (not yet introduced) is based on an idea I had that's also moderately surreal.
also [2002-05-10 00:37:14] staniel
If you're really curious, your best bet is a search.
well, huh [2002-05-10 01:41:56] jana
i think i like it.

i hope you continue the story. sequentially, if possible.
A Random Chapter? [2002-05-10 02:21:28] Jacques Kitch
This could be a first chapter, or a random chapter like "Knifekitten." It is certainly as good as or better that some of Rebecca Ore's stuff, some of which you might like. She'd been twice nominated for the Phillip K. Dick SF Award, and you got a shot at it, I think. Her book, Outlaw School might be interesting to you. She lived in Virginia for a while, and one of her books are about an alien who crash lands in Virgina and tries to blend in with the locals, being that he's stranded. You could look her up when you are in Philly, she likes single malt Scotch. Zindaloo is a funny word, it sounds like it could be a far-flung planet, or an exotic dancer.
eeenteresting [2002-05-10 06:57:43] alptraum
this does capture a very dream-like mood... i picture it as the beginning of a Terry Gilliam movie
description [2002-05-10 07:10:21] posthumous
Too much setting. It's overwhelming your character, your story, and even your grammar. And this is particularly ironic since there is a heavy mist with no visibility. I realize this is part of your style, but if it's yours then you must tame it!!
Too much setting [2002-05-10 09:19:17] Andrew
I'm not convinced that that kind of writing style isn't a legitimate way to write maybe its because thats how I write, sorta train-of-thought kind of stuff, I am so spiritually in touch with computers my thoughts run down my arms and onto the keyboard and no a chance for a full stop or a period of punctuation or anything.
You trying to start something? [2002-05-10 09:41:45] posthumous
Yo, I weren't calling nobody illegitimate
Setting [2002-05-10 10:12:07] Oscccar
Description and setting, both mood and physical, can be a wondrous thing. Cormac McCarthy, who at times can be a lugubrious storytelly, is a master of description. Read the prologue to "Suttree" for an example of some of the finest American writing this side of William Faulkner.

Me, I prefer big explosions and naked women so I'm hoping further installments will cater to my tastes.
Yes [2002-05-10 10:12:59] Oscccar
When I typed "storytelly," I meant it, dammit!
Cugel's Zindaloo [2002-05-10 12:05:35] Jonas
Did staniel just discover how helicopters work or something? Reminds me very strongly of Jack Vance--I hope one of the characters is a cold-hearted conniving asshole.
I weren't tryin' to start nuffink. [2002-05-10 12:17:57] Andrew
But if yer tryin' to start something I got a blade wit your name on, I scratched it on myself, it says posthumus.

If ya don't believe dat I'm ready to cut ya check out da blade.

http://www.miaow.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/dablade.jpg

werd!
Andrew, Jonas... [2002-05-10 12:39:25] staniel
This thing is almost entirely unrevised. You need to picture me waking up and thinking, "Wow, autogyro!" and immediately typing this up a few weeks ago, then not looking at it until yesterday night. I was going to pare down the mechanical description, but as for the scenery, I like scenery. I don't want to fall into Tolkien's trap and spend pages describing geography in the terms of someone who never took a long look at a map to see how mountain ranges behave, but I'll lay the excessive description on to any other degree I please.
AutoGyros vs 'Copters [2002-05-10 12:46:52] Andrew
Well Jonas, the man was actually talking about Autogyros, which are like a mix between the Helicopter and a Plane, the rotor's aren't powered except at the beginning to get them rotating and only forward air speed keeps them going, and also because of this there is no torque effect caused by the blades which means they don't have to have a "stabilizer".
So the only motor is often a propellor at the front which makes it keep moving foward. Although AutoGryos can be without a motor, and be towed into the air, or can be pedalled by the passenger.

They were most popular before the helicopter was invented as it allowed almost stationary hovering and were used to help build the radar network that helping us in Old Blighty win the war against those teutonic devils the Huns. Facinating machines a good bit of the old British innovation and engineering, would you know. What! Obviously when the Heli-Copter was introduced it made the AutoGyro obsolete, but let me tell you, the AutoGyro always was and always will be much cooler that the Helicopter, (Unless They have guns or your talking about those ones with the double rotors). At least thats what the kids of today say.
Gyro [2002-05-10 15:29:11] Jacques Kitch
I liked that tall skinny lunatic who flew the gyro in "Road Warrior"
AutoGyro [2002-05-10 16:10:00] Andrew
I always though an autogyro was when your pension went straight into your bank account each month.
hey [2002-05-10 16:41:48] uh not me? i cant think of a name
guess what
i dont have time to read that or write a good response things
cause im goin out partying with GIRLS!!!!!!
yeh you hurd me
want me to spell it out?
well fuck you cause i cant spell
peace
Not on your knife [2002-05-10 19:14:32] posthumous
Hey, put the blade away. I dig the story. Staniel, put as much description as you want, it's just that it trips over itself here and there and gets confusing. For example, you don't maintain your 3-foot visibility effect evenly. One place you do it well is with the harvesting engines.

I'm just offering some critique in case you want to publish it some day........
um [2002-05-10 19:15:06] posthumous
you know.... for money...
Scans [2002-05-10 19:43:00] Jacques Kitch
For me, it scans ok, and a good story is the main thing. Nobody accused me of overwriting, at least not in a long while. I look at some of the writing news froops and net fiction, there's a broad range of writing styles and subject treatment. In fact, there is so much variety of fictive stylistics that one pretty much has to write to an audience; you know, work the room. Ba-da-boom.
Autogyros vs. Helicopters [2002-05-10 20:35:28] Jonas
I was just joking. I don't know how helicopters work, or even what autogyros are ('cept for a joke in The Simpsons). I was just poking fun at the amount of detail. Ba-da-boom!
Ba-da-bing! [2002-05-10 22:04:02] Jacques Kitch
My sense of humor is so subtle as to be virtually undectible.
like I said... [2002-05-10 22:04:33] staniel
This was supposed to be revised before being posted. I clearly don't know a lot about autogyros, which strikes me as a more serious error than the visibility thing; fog can occur in patches.
also [2002-05-10 22:13:29] staniel
Publish for money? Serious?
Yoke [2002-05-10 22:25:50] Jonas
...is egg. But staniel, you made me believe.
err [2002-05-10 22:55:57] sally
YOLK is egg. jap steakhouse chef is yolkmaster. ass is for sitting.
If. [2002-05-11 03:09:18] A man in love
If this piece of writing is your own work (no disrespect intended but we live in a world of cut and paste.) it is well worthy of expansion and would get published. i should know i am a failed novelist. (well it sounds so much better than unemployed.) i thought the language was pretty special and i dont just say that to everybody.
Not Failed! [2002-05-11 07:12:01] Jacques Kitch
Just unpuplished. I look at it like if Michael Moore can get something like "Stupid White Men" to #1 on the Bestseller List, a) I can too!,b) I'm not certain that I'd want to. Someone is already doing Hunter Thompson, Williams Burroughs has already been done, and Nigel Plumworthy Figlet. I would advise doing what I do, invest in lots of pencils and fancy pens to improve writing, perhaps also some writing software, such as "Play Write" that will enable you to write stage plays and screen plays as well. Invent several nommes de plume and chemins de fer. Take to writing at odd hours as if seemingly moved by random inspirations. Cultivate a dry reportage style, or prentend that you are Scott and Zelda for a while.
zingers [2002-05-11 10:59:09] andy b
sorry to break the conversation that is filled with good thoughts and ideas but oh never mind
Fine! [2002-05-11 12:02:53]
You want to be anal retentive, go on wit yo' bad sef! You go, girlfriend! But evidently, I gots to tickle yo' ass with a feather. I mean, particularly nice weather, huh?
moneys [2002-05-12 22:10:56] posthumous
for the record, staniel, yes I was serious.
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