By: Hatless Jack [2006-06-01]

Bandana (How to)

Because you're doing it wrong.

  1. Fold bandana in half, producing large right triangle.
  2. Take both non ninety-degree corners in each hand and place towards back of head with forehead in centerline of bandana.
  3. Tie beginning of square knot.
  4. Place ninety-degree corner over top of head and in center of start of square knot.
  5. Finish square knot, firmly cinching ninety-degree corner in center of square knot.
  6. Straiten.
  7. Take off bandana.
  8. Invert bandana, placing square knot and vestigial corner flaps on the inside of bandana.
  9. Put on bandana.
  10. Straighten.
  11. Invert triangular flaps near both sides of top and back of head and tuck into space between bandana and side of head. Repeat as necessary.
  12. Straighten.
  13. You are not a pirate.
No wonder they call him "Hatless" [2006-06-01 01:43:55] Wyatt
This explains a lot. You like, lo-ride too, 'omes?

Also! [2006-06-01 02:42:50] König Prüße, GfbAEV
I like making the head-bands, and special attention is given to folding so that the design is best displayed. I've got one bandana that says "Sinaloa" and obviously that has to be centered-up.
SILENCE YOU! [2006-06-01 08:36:19] Hatless Jack
I learned my bandana stylings from a combination of cowboys and sixty-year-old bikers. The "do-rag", such as it is, is an abomination unto our lord Chernobog. If you can't fit some form of cowboy hat or helmet over it and it doesn't have a simplified paisley design on it... well then, it's just a kerchief and you're a woman. Furthermore, tying the bandana with the knot on the front of the head, as I've seen recently, is blasphemy of the utmost order, plus retarded (but mostly blasphemy). And going back to the do-rag: you're not supposed to wear it outside. The do-rag isn't so much a hat as an advanced hair-style preservation system.

The bandana as cultural shorthand for "utter badass" cannot, nay must not, be allowed to be diluted. Bow before the power of HATS.
hats = no hair [2006-06-01 10:43:59] Wyatt H Knott
Hats make you bald.

I do like my Tilley though, especially since it's not actually a Tilley, so I can pretend it's a bush hat and I'm a bad-ass special forces dude out for a weekend mission to save Long Island Sound from the powerboaters.

Tim O'Brien wore a baseball cap [2006-06-01 19:13:30] posthumous
in an interview 10 years ago. Draw your own conclusions.
http://www.bikerheadwear.com/ [2006-06-01 19:52:38] König Prüße, GfbAEV
http://www.bikerheadwear.com/
Worn on the head by... [2006-06-02 14:57:02] Sean
...dirtbags.
Me... [2006-06-02 15:52:13] König Prüße, GfbAEV
I just stick with the classic bucket, worn by golfers, lil' kids at the beach, and crazy old fishermen.
Let's have a show of hands here... [2006-06-02 17:52:06] Sean
Seriously, how many of you wear a bandana on your head?

Unless you're David Foster Wallace, it's hard to overlook.
Pirate Day! [2006-06-02 20:05:23] König Prüße, GfbAEV
Mostly, if I wear a bandana it's like a sweat-band. I got to thinking about Hulk Hogan's bandanas and dorags. I think that our local and state representatives should wear either red or blue bandanas on their heads so that we can tell which gang they belong to!
bandannnas [2006-06-02 22:18:00] Wyatt
We have two bandanas in the house. We use them as tablecloths for our nightstands. The last time either of them was applied to a human body was in 1987.

Bikini [2006-06-02 22:23:38] König Prüße, GfbAEV
You can make a bikini from four bandanas!
i'm [2006-06-03 03:24:54] buzz mccoy
disturbed that you would know that

-buzz
Exactly! Sean understands. [2006-06-03 04:42:52] Hatless Jack
If you're going to steal dirtbag fashion you NEED TO DO IT RIGHT. Furthermore, it needs to be done in a meticulous and methodical fashion. Today I saw someone wearing a do-rag so loose and large the tails covered the entire back of his neck and a good portion of his shoulders. Then he put a baseball cap over it and I swear it looked like he was fighting the Berbers. And now he's dead. Let that be a lesson to all of you.
Another thing I dislike about bandanas... [2006-06-03 09:11:14] Sean
...is when people tie a bandana around their dog's neck, to serve as a jaunty little scarf.
doing it wrong [2006-06-03 10:37:02] Wyatt H Knott
"And now he's dead."

Yeah, I know people like that. Hannibal Lecter had it right - he calls them the "free-range rude." His solution for dealing with them isn't bad either, he just has a tendancy to overdo it with the sauces.



How 'bout Janis Joplin? [2006-06-03 22:29:49] König Prüße, GfbAEV
When she pulled her harpoon
Out of her dirty red bandana and
She was playin' soft while Bobby sang the blues, yeah
Windshield wipers slappin' time

That was just before she tied the dirty red bandana onto her dog for a blindfold, thru a Frisbee, and the dog ran into a tree trying to catch it.
ganstas [2006-07-24 17:08:36] hyjughk
put them over their face nose and mouth
i stick them in pussy [2006-07-24 17:09:22] vhgf
everynight
Dress like a pirate [2007-05-23 00:59:30] ARRR!
Me and my girlfriends wanted to dress up for the release of the third Pirates movie this weekend, and none of us had the slightest clue how to tie a do-rag. This site really saved us!
Now I know how to tie this on my head! [2008-02-22 18:36:56] Chicken Hat Bob
Only problem is for some reason my hats won't fit now. The bandana doesn't even take up much space and no hats can fit. I previously wore the banadana around my face like a bandit put on some sunglasses wore a chicken hat and put on a blazer and that was my fashion.
Jukka Nevalainen! [2008-08-09 20:30:58] Metal Fan
I didn't start wearing bandanas until I new about the great band of "Nightwish"!! Their Drummer, Jukka Nevalainen, is the coolest guy ever and he wears bandanas. That's why I started!
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