By: The Editors [2006-06-27]

We Get Letters

a look into the thingsihate.org mailbag...

From: kyle@xxxxxxxxxxxx.com <kyle@xxxxxxxxxxxx.com>   
To: editors@thingsihate.org
Date: Jun 19, 2006 10:44 PM
Subject: Question About thingsihate.org

I noticed you link to kittenstoyroom.com on your webpage http://thingsihate.org/article/540/the_j_geils_band_and_the_missing_vulva.  I am emailing to ask you to link to our site, AdultSexToys.com, since we also offer adult toys.  You can put a free link to your site in our directory if you would like, at http://www.adultsextoys.com/cgi-bin/links/add.cgi


Thanks,
Kyle
AdultSexToys.com

From: The Editors <editors@thingsihate.org>
To: "kyle@xxxxxxxxxxxx.com" <kyle@xxxxxxxxxxxx.com>
Date: Jun 26, 2006 7:58 PM
Subject: Re: Question About thingsihate.org

Dear Kyle,

We here at thingsihate.org would be pleased to link to your website. It's important to remember, however, that in these days of e-commerce and the web 2.0, doing business on the super information highway often requires that one be willing to, how they say, "grease the palms."

Actually, considering your line of work, you may have taken that quite literally.  Rest assured: applying lubrication of any sort to our hands will not be necessary for this transaction. (Though there was some recent unfortunateness, lasting several hours, involving a shiny object in a jar, where I could have used your help.)

An assortment of dildos, blow-up dolls, spermicidal jellies and bondage gear of leather and/or latex would make excellent prizes for one of our frequent contests.  Just imagine it, Kyle: the latest thingsihate.org contest going full force, and proudly displayed at the top of each update: the first, second, and third place prizes -- quality products from AdultSexToys.com.  The absolute cream of the online webzine writing world, masturbating at the speed of thought thanks to your shop.  You can't buy that kind of publicity, Kyle, and I can well imagine that you are swelling (so to speak) with pride at the thought.  If you have a sampler, this would be perfect.

thingsihate.org receives over 1 million unique hits per day from well-to-do, middle-aged women, a demographic whence, unless my sex toy lore fails me, your bread is buttered (not a euphemism).

Please think it over and get back to us, Kyle.  At the very least, we are particularly interested in the Dr. Z Nipple Pleaser.  With a retail price of just thirty dollars, we feel this is fair.

Yours truly,

The thingsihate.org editors.

PS - Is putting the free link to thingsihate.org in your directory conditional upon our adding a link to AdultSexToys.com on ours?  The adult sex toy market is one we've been trying to penetrate (also not a euphemism) for a long time. We feel there is a lot of cross-marketing possibility there, and this is a business we would definitely like to get in bed with (not euphemism).

Don't forget the boys! [2006-06-27 00:27:50] Wyatt
There's a big, well-to-do, middle-aged male demographic too! Donate a Dayton Rains Cock Sucker for the contest and you'll have cross-references for hours!
ThingsIHate: Paradigming outside the box of I-business 2.0. [2006-06-27 05:09:11] Hatless Jack
ThingsIhate brings with it a wide demographic ranging from lunatic to psychopath with all manner of maniac and madman in-between. It's also making significant inroads into the pervert and degenerate demographics, and has significant brand recognition among hobos and other transients. Furthermore, it has complete and total market saturation in the coveted "hot-hot-man-on-boat" fetish.
By the way [2006-06-27 16:25:38] Sean
No response yet.
Don't worry, Sean [2006-06-28 03:33:01] Anon.Y.Mous
It takes longer to type with just one hand. Ha ha! Seriously, I wonder if working at a place that deals in items of a sexual nature all day inures you to their charms, or even dulls the edge of sex and sensuality itself. Like working at an ice cream shop and losing the taste for ice cream. Or are you driven to the darker side of ice cream, the meat flavors, and other non-traditional flavors that you hear are now served at those wacky cutting-edge restaurants that seem to delight in odd pairings that can't possibly taste good, but at least taste different? I've read a couple of science fiction stories where the human libido was purposefully supressed; a willing choice by the supressee, and they claimed that it led to clearer thinking and the energy to get a lot done other than complying with the biological urge to mate.
Oi! [2006-06-28 15:28:05] König Prüße, GfbAEV
You can't invent stuff like this. But I'm glad that you pounced on it!
Penis [2006-09-15 12:43:08] Download 7 penis enlargement videos. Use
Download 7 penis enlargement videos. User ratings & reviews of 55 penis enlargement pills.
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