By: staniel [2003-02-06]

Riot!

two years late

While working at Radio Shack some years ago, I had to hear an attempt at a swing song by a former marginally successful ska band. The corporate warlords had decided that the best way to drive employees insane was to force them to keep a tape of Radio Shack ads playing at all times, and they amended this during my employment there to include two rock videos per cassette. One such video was "Zoot Suit Riot."

Now, I slept a lot in high school, but I know what the real zoot suit riots were: during the second World War, Mexican nationals would head north of the border to put the moves on the American seoritas. With most of the strapping young men of the US off to war, and the rest reduced by wartime rationing to nerdy suits with thin lapels, it was like shooting fish in a barrel. Unfortunately for said Mexicans, the draftees would occasionally come back on leave and start riots to defend the honor of their girlfriends.

I explained this to a befuddled co-worker when he began singing along, figuring that a conversation would provide a (slightly) less annoying use for his voice. I was not yet as jaded as I've become, and I was surprised that he had no idea what I was talking about. Forgetting stuff from school is one thing, but his memory couldn't even be jogged.

I mentioned this occurrence during a recent conversation about the differences between actual big band music and the modern imitations, and it occurred to me that people who liked that song probably don't know what it's about, and people who do know the subject matter probably aren't that impressed by the song. So, aside from the song having a '40s sound and the lyrics being based on '40s events, what's the connection? God damn those Cherry Poppin' Daddies.

I originally thought the song was by Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, and when I investigated, I found out that you can win a "memorable event" for your high school jazz band by covering one of their songs. This means now there are swing revival bands on both sides of the public education spectrum, and that doesn't sit well with me at all.
twist ending [2003-02-06 00:18:00] casey
A girl in my American Histroy 152 class did a presentation on the riots. She had her sister sing the song in front of the class and during the chorus (the part where they say "Zoot suit riot!") the girl would jump out from behind her sister and shout the refrain ("Riot!"). I think that took a lot of balls. A lot of DOG BALLS.
Pachuco Attitude [2003-02-06 00:31:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
I was reading the Art Daily, and they had an interesting section (Flash Player) about this stuff. Actually, it was linked from PBS' "American Experience" section on the Mexicans in LA I think. But funny to me is the bit about the Pachuco Attitude ...it has this old cholo talking about how they danced.
Shivers up your spine... [2003-02-06 04:41:00] Antwan
We need more creepy articles like this.
Write! [2003-02-06 08:52:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
Write a story, Antwan! Surely, you have one. Put pen to paper. Come on! Three hundred words at least, due by next Wednesday; or you have to stay after.
Pure, Unadulturated Chills [2003-02-06 10:22:00] Melissa
Frankly that story scares the shit out of me because I know a lot of people, too many people, actually, like the one you're talking about.
Annna tells me there is a Weird Al version. [2003-02-06 19:46:00] staniel
I managed not to hear it, though.
[2003-02-06 21:16:00] Jonas
It's called "Grapefruit Diet", and it's a bad re-hashed version of "Fat".

If you didn't orginally think "Fat" was bad.
"Fat" [2003-02-06 21:43:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
I liked the vid, Mike Jackson as a fat-assed idiot was pretty good, the choreography was OK. I am enjoying watching Michael unwind after the fashion of Zsa Zsa Gabor, like "I can't get any publicity and I'm fresh out of talent and new ideas and so I'll throw my clone baby off the balcony and write a jiggy song about babies in hebbin' just like that Eric Claptrap dOOd because when you're a played out pop star, you either got to OD, throw your baby off the balcony, or shoot your old lady." That and all of the little boys whom Michael knew are now over thirty. Well, he could do it with Little Richard; I'd pay to see that. And Stanley Lefkowitz could get his percentage.
Marvin Tikvah [2003-02-07 12:55:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
For some reason, Stanley Lefkowitz made me think of Marvin Tikvah
I wrote! [2003-02-07 17:03:00] Antwan
Okay, Okay, chill Mr. Biscuit. I wrote a story, but it's only 299 and 1/100th words long. I mean... How do you end a sentence that has
Huzzah! [2003-02-07 18:04:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
Thus spracht Antwan. Now the riddle of the Universe shall unravel, or at least we shall have some amusement and tales of adventure. Please not another "Townies" story, lest I hork. But from Antwan, I don't expect Townies. Nobody calls me Mr., exect snotty store clerks and waiters, people who don't know any better. If I ever see that waiter with the giant pepper mill again, I'd be glad to beat him to death with it.
Townies? [2003-02-07 18:42:00] Antwan
I've taken so much from the on-line humor community (this site, sixsixfive, seanbaby, portalofevil) I decided to give something back. Hey, who knows? Maybe someone will use one of my ancte... antedot... errr... jokes at their next social event.
New Blood...er, Ink [2003-02-07 18:55:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
If you've taken anything from any of those groups, you better give it back right now!
I'm a thief! [2003-02-07 19:04:00] Antwan
So I should only rip stuff off from this site then?
Yes [2003-02-07 19:10:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
Yes, rip this stuff off, it's superior stuff. We better stop talking, or Pop and Staniel will tell us to get a room. I am looking forward to the possibility of reading your obra.
*salutes* [2003-02-07 19:26:00] Antwan
Then until next update... (which possibly might be my story) If it helps... YOU'RE REALLY FREAKING COOL ANNA!
Update [2003-02-07 20:22:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
Well, the next update will likely be the pen cartoon aka Zurilismus; und zo, it might be a fortnight, mein freund. Until then, auf wienerschnitzel.
Oh! [2003-02-07 20:23:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
You may well have lost points for leaving out an "N" in Annna. Who knows; you may well get extra points for adding extra "N's"
"Sailor Riots" [2003-02-07 22:49:00] devojane
http://www.suavecito.com/history.htm
This was the second link google came up with, and it gives a pretty good account of the story. I didn't hear anything about this in school, (and i live in LA) but I've read other articles on the subject. "Defend the honor of their girlfriends"? Not really. That song is even stupider once you know the facts. (by the way, this guy sells great suits.)
sorry [2003-02-07 22:51:00] devojane
jeeze, i really come across as a pedantic jerk, don't i? it's like hearing yourself on tape. "do i really sound like that?"
suavecito [2003-02-07 23:09:00] Hieronymous Biscuit
no, you're much less of a pedantic jerk than I am. And I liked the Suavecito link. They had a good glossary of pachuco-speak. Anyway, I've got a gold watch chain, but it's not five-feet long. Que onda, vata? Suavecito is one one the local terms here, too. Orale, anda suave--
oops [2003-02-08 05:40:00] Antwan
ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNA
You haven't been good. [2003-02-08 07:52:00] staniel
When you've been good you can have another Annna article.

devojane, it appears that my high school was not entirely forthcoming -- I remember the mention of zoot suits not conforming to war rationing, but the ties to the Japanese concentration camps and the specifics of the riots were left out. And the "honor of their girlfriends" is more in line with the song than with actual history!
Zireality intrudes [2003-02-09 09:30:00] posthumous
hey, did you guys get my comic? I mean um did you receive my comic?
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