Zirealism

Does this have something to do with Don Hertzfeldt?

see also: Bitter Films' "Rejected", in particular the picture with the banana. in the movie the banana says "I am a banana" after the person says "my spoon is too large" or something to that effect. if you were a bad person you could find this on your internet stealing program of choice but that simply snatches food out of the mouths of starving artists. "'Rejected' became one of the lowest budgeted films ever nominated for an Academy Award in 2001."

Eat, eat, eat the banana

That's funny! I was just considering changing my name to Johnny Dayo. Banana trees are nice, and bananas that ripen on the tree are very good. I saw some steel barrels like oil drums that were painted blue and white with the Chiquita logo and said "Banana Paste" so I guess that you can buy 50 gallons of banana goop for cooking if you like. Also, banana fritters are very good.

The one saving grace of this comic was the man's demonic expression.

It's funny and bizarre in a Kafkaesque kinda way. Remember "Metamorphosis" where the guy woke up one day and he was a giant beetle? Well, wouldn't it be funny to wake up one day and be a giant banana? What if you had a "split personality?" Maybe you could be "top banana!" It's not that the cartoon isn't funny, Antwan; you're not funny! Funny is as funny does.

...the sumbitch obviously IS a banana.

As I speak a six-headed hydra is beating the hell out of my team on Final Fantasy, so I'll be brief. I don't get posthumous's jokes. I don't understand what the rabbit one was about and I don't get this one. IT'S A MAN IN A BANNANA SUIT/COSTUME THAT'S YELLING "I'M NOT A BANNANA" If I wanted to see something like that, I'd go watch Saturday Night Live. I've seen funnnier stu- Hell, I think the hydra just ripped of Ryu's leg.

OK, I get it. Subtlety is lost on you; you like getting hit in the head with a hammer.

I need an obvious punch-line.

I think that people would get in line to punch you.

Line starts here.

"Rise great fans of Antwan, come protect your King!" cried Antwan the Great.

It was Hallowe'en night, many moons ago, and I was heading over to my friend's place armed with my BOX turtle The Might Thor to help give out candies to all the kiddies in the neighborhood. That night was going to be a special night, it was, for I had thoughtfully and with large quantities of vodka and malice, made a little costume for The Mighty Thor. It consisted of black fake fur and giant pipecleaners to make a suit shaped like a giant fucking knobby-kneed spider.
Held on by velcro and crawling across the floor (I KNEW there was a use for a BOX turtle~ it was just a matter of thinking one up), I figured it was a perfect little trick to make the little goils and boils shit there underoos when they came begging, like the little snot-nosed candy-grubbing malcontents they are. So into a paper bag went The Might Thor and off we went in the LandYacht to do our good deed for society as a whole and THAT neghborhood in parTICular. But first a pitstop at my favorite watering hole for a cool libation betwixt home and friend to soothe my parched throat. Bag in hand, I entered the establishment and bellied up to the bar for a drinky-poo or two. Setting my precious cargo on the bar, the hated 'tender commented on the wriggly contents. Releasing The Might Thor from her confines, she scuttled across the bar knocked over a drink (not mine) and trundled down the bar. Unlike my dawg (yes THAT dawg) this turtle was "Abandon all hope ye who enter here." at the bar and was a big hit with the barley-drinkers gathered round. Warming to my notoriety, I started juggling her (she HATES that and in fact took her by surprise because after all, it wasn't even Saturday night. In fact it wasn't night at all).
Soon I had forgotten all about my itinerary and was eyeball deep in a comforting mindnumbing alcamahol-induced haze.
As the bar patrons were eating their hamburger and fries I circled about, Thor in hand, pretending *I* was eating a hamburger myself. BOX turtles look freakishly like a hamburger bun when they are completely closed up and I was gleaning great pleasure from the startled expressions of strangers trying to wolf their food down and bolt for some unknown reason.
At about this time the barkeep had had enough and told me to cease and desist or I would be cut off. Turning my evil eye to the unmanned shuffleboard game, I set one rock on top of another, and set poor long-suffering Thor upon the topmost of the two. Having tired of watching her 'swim', I decided to add to her fun and enjoyment by sliiiding her, rocks and all, down the table to play knock-off with an invisible opponent's rocks.
Laughing uproariously, I once again drew the wrath of the bartender. He informed me that he was going to report me to the SPCA, and I informed HIM that my turtle LOVES me and what's more she LOVES to play shuffleboard. I was then unceremoniously booted from my beloved bar, and we arrived at my friend's place at about 12:00 at night, too late to scare the kiddies, but scaring my friend nonetheless.

"And my loyal subjects heard my cries and issued in a story of such magnitude, that even the hardest of biscuit's heart's were softed." said the solemn Antwan.

I know just how he feels. I'm not a banana either.

We've come to an impass because I AM a banana.

I love you guys.

And Antwan, I'm sorry I don't make you laugh. It's unfair because you make me laugh out loud at least twice a week. but at least I taught you how to be bold.

I believe him to be a rogue genetic experiment created for the express purpose of infiltrating banana society, who seeks atonement for the crimes he has comitted against bananakind. He shouts that he is not a banana for he seeks emancipation from his kind and the right for his people to live in peace and not have to serve an evil regime who seeks to opress bananas.

BTW, Anyone remember Bananaman?

Perhaps the illustration is attempting to depict the duality of Mananaity. Perhaps this particular Manana is like Knifekitten in that he acts on the instinct of one thing and is presented in a way contrary to those instincts. In this case he looks like a banana but his instinct is to shake his fist defiantly in the face of all those who would consume him.

There was a Banana Man who walked onstage empty handed, and then started going through his pockets pulling out many bananas, single and in bunches. He soon was confronted with many, many bananas and what to do with them all. So, he solved the problem by taking a train out of his pockets with an engine and several cars that he loaded all of the bananas into, then he got onto the train and rode off!

Just 144 more hours until the next zirealism.

...shopping days until Christmas?

I play an online game called Water Margin. I use the handle Muhlakai. (I also use the Petey image in the news column as my avatar!)

Right now there's a poll going on that asks whether someone hates me, is me or is a homosexual. I was just hoping that maybe some of y'all could vote that you ARE me. I believe that you do have to register but it's free and they won't spam you. Thanks, all!

And just for the record, I'm not a banana either.

This zirealism is so obviously and homage by posthumous to David Lynch's groundbreaking masterpiece "The Elephant Man." A boy is born with a birth defect that causes him to grow a thick, pulpy skin colored a garish yellow. The poor child only has one arm, and the bones of his legs are fused together. His humped back elongates vertically, reaching unusual proportions, and as he reaches puberty his deformities have all but transformed him from man to fruit. Rejected by his family as a child, denied treatment by hospitals, the teen is forced to live life as a sideshow geek, living in a tent where callous, wretched humanity pays a pence apiece to taunt and gawk at him in horror. But his spirit remains unbroken and he learns he is more than what his horrid outer shell belies. In a pivotal moment in his life, he screams out against the injustices of the world, "I am NOT a banana! I am a human being!"

Does this mean I'm going to have to sit through the touching story of how the bananaman is really lovely on the inside despite his hideously deformed outside?

Bannanaman...

"I am not a crook" is what I thoughta.

no you will not, laconic. that is the wonder and the glory of cartoons. They are over before they are begun. Thank you Oscccar!

I agree to HB's suggestion, but only if it is fed to Antwan on saturday at midnight and we have to wait for him to poop it out.

Deep down inside all of us is a small person wrapped in a banana skin screamning I am not a banana, this comic is testament to the fact that so few of us let that man in a banana skin out to shout "I am not a banana."