The Cat's Ass Journals
the first installment of an irregular series
Sunday, 20th July 2003
Bought flushable litter and two very cheap plastic litterboxes. The cat is currently using a short Rubbermaid Roughneck box full of generic clumping litter - she hasn't had any trouble when I change brands, which is about every time I buy new stuff. I go by what's cheap. The box is also on top of an astroturf doormat, to catch any flying litter.
What I need to do is to toss the litter and put away the tub. Then I'll put the new box and the new litter in exactly the same place, minus the mat. That should be enough changes for one day.
But I'll do it tomorrow. Buying all the stuff is enough for tonight.
Friday, 25th July 2003
I'm not so good at the "update daily" thing. Anyway, I put the new box out Tuesday night, trash night, and the cat used it just fine. I've been moving it slowly towards the bathroom, and tonight it's almost at the edge of the kitchen. About five feet to go, plus maneuvering inside the bathroom itself.
There hasn't been much spillage. Mom had said the cat liked to kick up litter, but I haven't seen it. Maybe it's this new litter - it's pretty fine and more like powder than sand - or maybe Mom was mistaken. She did have five cats.
My plan is now to move the box into the bathroom, then under the sink. There it'll be right next to the toilet yet fairly out of the way. That's when I'll start cutting the sides down and reducing the amount of litter. When it's shallow and only has an inch or so of litter, I'll put it on top of the toilet bowl. Once she's going up there, everything's great.
Everyone thinks this won't work. Matie and Pop think the cat is stupid, but Mom and I disagree. Mom points out that the cat would always come and get someone when she knocked something over, meowing until the human fixed it. The problem was that she is deaf, nearly from birth, and often doesn't notice that she's knocked over small things. The deafness is also why I tend to refer to her as "the cat" - we only have one cat and it's not like she recognizes her name. (It's Jessie.)
I've noticed that she calls my attention to problems like empty food and water by yowling at the dish, then walking over to me, yowling, then walking back to the dish. Usually I've gotten up by then and come closer, so she walks a shorter distance every time until I'm standing right by the problem. She's done this for empty food and water, a full litterbox, a pile of knocked-over magazines and, most endearingly, once when I was up entirely too late she attempted to herd me into bed.
So in conclusion, Jessie does make amazingly loud and horrible noises, as well as knock small objects over without noticing, but those are just the lovable quirks of a deaf cat. She's fairly intelligent, as far as cats go.
And pretty soon she'll use the toilet.
Thursday, 31st July 2003
Nothing of note. Litterbox is now inside the bathroom, under the sink. I had a few scares, worried that the cat had gotten outside or stopped peeing, but as it turns out she has a new hot weather routine. In the back of my closet is a hole in the wall, covered loosely with a board. Behind it lies the awe and mystery of a whole bunch of cold water pipes, where the cat sleeps from about eleven AM until the sun goes down. It seems to work out for her, other than the time I looked for her frantically for half an hour and in the process moved a box of shoes in front of the hole, blocking her in. (That was before I knew she was in there.)
Tonight, after I study for my final and do some other things, I'll clean the box out again. I guess it's about time to cut off the rim. A search online turned up dozens of slightly different ways to get a cat to use the toilet, but one good idea I gleaned was putting the litterbox on top of a phonebook before it goes on top of the toilet. That might be worth a go. I still need to reduce the amount of litter and cut down the sides, though, so that's a while off.
Monday, 4th August 2003
It's still in the bathroom, under the sink, rim cut off. I really didn't do much other than slowly lower the litter level. I was busy, until last night.
I have purchased some heavy-duty tinfoil roasting pans with plans to eventually jam them in the toilet.
I came to the realization that the cat would not be able to jump into a box on the toilet, no matter how shallow, without upsetting it, especially if there wasn't much litter. I also don't think she'd like to. So I deformed one of the roasting pans to fit in the toilet, and am about to replace her litter box with one of the unmodified pans. Once has used the regular pan for a few days, I will put the deformed one in the toilet and show her where it is. I think I'd better put a box near the toilet so she has a step, but I think that after physically putting her in the toilet-mounted pan she will figure it out. I hope.
Like I said, I bought the heavy-duty kind. They say they can take a 25-pound bird. I think the cat is about 10 or 12 pounds, so that should be okay, I guess. I also had to mold the pan a bit to fit it in the toilet, so it has a lot more lip than before. It should work.
Tonight: putting the regular pan out.
Tuesday, 5th August 2003
I feel awful. The cat was doing okay with about an inch and a half of litter in a disposable metal roasting pan, so I decided to push ahead and nestle it in the toilet. I put the same litter in and put a stepstool next to the toilet, so the cat could climb rather than making a blind jump. She didn't really go into the bathroom at all, so about noon I picked her up and showed her everything - put her on the stool, then put her in the pan in the toilet and moved her paws to dig. She peed a little and then jumped down. I was very self-congratulatory and even called Mom and Pop to brag. Such hubris was swiftly rewarded.
I went off to run some errands. Coming back, no mess in the litter. I picked her up and showed her the litterbox again several times, no results. Went about my life. She was still drinking and seemed okay, but about four PM she started meowing. I checked everything, then put her in the toilet pan. She leapt out. Time passed, until at nine PM I realized she hadn't peed in nine hours. Yikes. I took the deformed pan out of the toilet and set it down on the floor. The bottom was a little convex now from being shaped into the toilet, so it wobbled a bit as the cat ran over to it and took an enormous leak.
That poor noble creature. She held it for over eight hours rather than poop or pee on the floor and hardly complained at all. I really wish Matie didn't hate her so much - every time she has meowed so loudly and disturbingly, she has had an actual reason. God, I feel awful for doing that to the cat. I guess I'll leave the deformed pan out on the floor tonight and tomorrow daytime, then put it in the toilet as I'm going to bed. If she gets used to peeing in something so wobbly, she might be more ready to pee in it when it's in the toilet. She can have leisure time to figure it out while I'm in bed, then I'll put it back on the floor when I get up and she can pee again, if she couldn't figure it out overnight.
I bought a smaller litter scoop, since now I'm dealing with more frequent cleaning and smaller amounts of litter. It's metal and on a long handle, basically a curved spatula. It's nice. I also bought a bucket to put next to the toilet for her to use as a step, but it's a little smaller than I'd like. I thought the stepstool was fine, but Matie had trouble with it. I would think that I, as the taller, fatter and clumsier of us, would be the barometer of toilet accessibility, but that is not the case. I also need to sweep the bathroom - Matie is complaining of litter in her feet after a shower. I wear slippers after a shower for just this reason, but I won't push my luck. Matie hates the cat and most things that have to do with her, so it's a miracle she's putting up with having a litterbox in the toilet at all.
She keeps suggesting killing the cat and getting a new one, but I think she's kidding.
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Bought flushable litter and two very cheap plastic litterboxes. The cat is currently using a short Rubbermaid Roughneck box full of generic clumping litter - she hasn't had any trouble when I change brands, which is about every time I buy new stuff. I go by what's cheap. The box is also on top of an astroturf doormat, to catch any flying litter.
What I need to do is to toss the litter and put away the tub. Then I'll put the new box and the new litter in exactly the same place, minus the mat. That should be enough changes for one day.
But I'll do it tomorrow. Buying all the stuff is enough for tonight.
Friday, 25th July 2003
I'm not so good at the "update daily" thing. Anyway, I put the new box out Tuesday night, trash night, and the cat used it just fine. I've been moving it slowly towards the bathroom, and tonight it's almost at the edge of the kitchen. About five feet to go, plus maneuvering inside the bathroom itself.
There hasn't been much spillage. Mom had said the cat liked to kick up litter, but I haven't seen it. Maybe it's this new litter - it's pretty fine and more like powder than sand - or maybe Mom was mistaken. She did have five cats.
My plan is now to move the box into the bathroom, then under the sink. There it'll be right next to the toilet yet fairly out of the way. That's when I'll start cutting the sides down and reducing the amount of litter. When it's shallow and only has an inch or so of litter, I'll put it on top of the toilet bowl. Once she's going up there, everything's great.
Everyone thinks this won't work. Matie and Pop think the cat is stupid, but Mom and I disagree. Mom points out that the cat would always come and get someone when she knocked something over, meowing until the human fixed it. The problem was that she is deaf, nearly from birth, and often doesn't notice that she's knocked over small things. The deafness is also why I tend to refer to her as "the cat" - we only have one cat and it's not like she recognizes her name. (It's Jessie.)
I've noticed that she calls my attention to problems like empty food and water by yowling at the dish, then walking over to me, yowling, then walking back to the dish. Usually I've gotten up by then and come closer, so she walks a shorter distance every time until I'm standing right by the problem. She's done this for empty food and water, a full litterbox, a pile of knocked-over magazines and, most endearingly, once when I was up entirely too late she attempted to herd me into bed.
So in conclusion, Jessie does make amazingly loud and horrible noises, as well as knock small objects over without noticing, but those are just the lovable quirks of a deaf cat. She's fairly intelligent, as far as cats go.
And pretty soon she'll use the toilet.
Thursday, 31st July 2003
Nothing of note. Litterbox is now inside the bathroom, under the sink. I had a few scares, worried that the cat had gotten outside or stopped peeing, but as it turns out she has a new hot weather routine. In the back of my closet is a hole in the wall, covered loosely with a board. Behind it lies the awe and mystery of a whole bunch of cold water pipes, where the cat sleeps from about eleven AM until the sun goes down. It seems to work out for her, other than the time I looked for her frantically for half an hour and in the process moved a box of shoes in front of the hole, blocking her in. (That was before I knew she was in there.)
Tonight, after I study for my final and do some other things, I'll clean the box out again. I guess it's about time to cut off the rim. A search online turned up dozens of slightly different ways to get a cat to use the toilet, but one good idea I gleaned was putting the litterbox on top of a phonebook before it goes on top of the toilet. That might be worth a go. I still need to reduce the amount of litter and cut down the sides, though, so that's a while off.
Monday, 4th August 2003
It's still in the bathroom, under the sink, rim cut off. I really didn't do much other than slowly lower the litter level. I was busy, until last night.
I have purchased some heavy-duty tinfoil roasting pans with plans to eventually jam them in the toilet.
I came to the realization that the cat would not be able to jump into a box on the toilet, no matter how shallow, without upsetting it, especially if there wasn't much litter. I also don't think she'd like to. So I deformed one of the roasting pans to fit in the toilet, and am about to replace her litter box with one of the unmodified pans. Once has used the regular pan for a few days, I will put the deformed one in the toilet and show her where it is. I think I'd better put a box near the toilet so she has a step, but I think that after physically putting her in the toilet-mounted pan she will figure it out. I hope.
Like I said, I bought the heavy-duty kind. They say they can take a 25-pound bird. I think the cat is about 10 or 12 pounds, so that should be okay, I guess. I also had to mold the pan a bit to fit it in the toilet, so it has a lot more lip than before. It should work.
Tonight: putting the regular pan out.
Tuesday, 5th August 2003
I feel awful. The cat was doing okay with about an inch and a half of litter in a disposable metal roasting pan, so I decided to push ahead and nestle it in the toilet. I put the same litter in and put a stepstool next to the toilet, so the cat could climb rather than making a blind jump. She didn't really go into the bathroom at all, so about noon I picked her up and showed her everything - put her on the stool, then put her in the pan in the toilet and moved her paws to dig. She peed a little and then jumped down. I was very self-congratulatory and even called Mom and Pop to brag. Such hubris was swiftly rewarded.
I went off to run some errands. Coming back, no mess in the litter. I picked her up and showed her the litterbox again several times, no results. Went about my life. She was still drinking and seemed okay, but about four PM she started meowing. I checked everything, then put her in the toilet pan. She leapt out. Time passed, until at nine PM I realized she hadn't peed in nine hours. Yikes. I took the deformed pan out of the toilet and set it down on the floor. The bottom was a little convex now from being shaped into the toilet, so it wobbled a bit as the cat ran over to it and took an enormous leak.
That poor noble creature. She held it for over eight hours rather than poop or pee on the floor and hardly complained at all. I really wish Matie didn't hate her so much - every time she has meowed so loudly and disturbingly, she has had an actual reason. God, I feel awful for doing that to the cat. I guess I'll leave the deformed pan out on the floor tonight and tomorrow daytime, then put it in the toilet as I'm going to bed. If she gets used to peeing in something so wobbly, she might be more ready to pee in it when it's in the toilet. She can have leisure time to figure it out while I'm in bed, then I'll put it back on the floor when I get up and she can pee again, if she couldn't figure it out overnight.
I bought a smaller litter scoop, since now I'm dealing with more frequent cleaning and smaller amounts of litter. It's metal and on a long handle, basically a curved spatula. It's nice. I also bought a bucket to put next to the toilet for her to use as a step, but it's a little smaller than I'd like. I thought the stepstool was fine, but Matie had trouble with it. I would think that I, as the taller, fatter and clumsier of us, would be the barometer of toilet accessibility, but that is not the case. I also need to sweep the bathroom - Matie is complaining of litter in her feet after a shower. I wear slippers after a shower for just this reason, but I won't push my luck. Matie hates the cat and most things that have to do with her, so it's a miracle she's putting up with having a litterbox in the toilet at all.
She keeps suggesting killing the cat and getting a new one, but I think she's kidding.
Find out more with: